2009-02-28

avatar_1: (Invincible)
It's 2009, the 10 year anniversary of a lot of things. School. My last year, grade 12. The year a lot of life-changing things happened, not excluding the deaths of Mark Camilleri and Lauren Fraser.

There was a poem I read somewhere afterwards as part of the rituals that happen after someone's passing. I thought that I originally read it as part of the story on the front page of the local newspaper, but that wasn't the case. The story was much more anecdotal and personal, talking about who they were. I only know this because I still have a copy of that page of the newspaper. Carried it with me from Mackay, to Brisbane, to Melbourne, among the rest of the stuff I saved from school.

The poem is still in there on a separate bit of water-stained paper. I didn't know the origin of the poem and I actually thought it was written by Sam Langford. It turns out that at the time, nobody knew who wrote it. Thanks to the magic of wikipedia, we now know exactly who wrote it.

The only reason this came up at all is because I was just watching an episode of Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles, and the episode involves a funeral, where someone was reading out this poem. I recognised it immediately and this is the first time I've realised that it wasn't written by someone from school. After 10 years.

It's on this wikipedia page that I looked up the Uses in Popular Culture section for anything else I might have recognised, and the only one that jumped out at me was a song by Jem, called "You Will Make It".

The only reason this jumped out at me at all was because someone I work with recommended Jem to me and gave me some of her music to check out. It seems quite likely to me that I would never have heard of this artist had I not been working here, with him. There was no reason for him to really recommend music - it's not something we would normally do, and at the time, I had no idea why it even came up. I was open, I listened to it, and it wasn't bad.

After taking a closer look at Jem's wikipedia page to see what album this song was on, I found that of the two albums she has released, I have the wrong one. I took a closer look at her more popular songs and gave the one at the top of the list another listen. You see, I listened to her songs, and it wasn't bad. But it wasn't fantastic either, and I've never quite been able to memorise or pick out any of her songs from the others (except one other, which I had planned to use on Retreat as a maybe) and I even have trouble differentiating Jem from the other two artists I heard the same day.

Jem's most popular song was okay. The playlist continued on random. To understand the rest of this, you need to know that in the grand scheme of things, I have not been feeling fantastic lately. I have been looking for answers to my very not-clear questions for a long time, and they have not been coming.

The next song in the playlist was the one that reminded me of something that has been plaguing me, and at the same time holds together my life's foundations every single day.

The next song in the playlist could have responded to the last, reminding me why I need to stay strong. Reaffirming my foundation. Not just motivating me. Like telling me why I want what I want and why I do what I do.

The next song in the playlist told me how to proceed.

And the next song told me not to fucking want to give up.

If all of that is just coincidence and nothing else, I must be having a very lucky day.
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